LEAVING FAMILY VIOLENCE IS NOT EASY

Stories on leaving family violence:

ANGELA’S STORY

I left my ex-partner two and a half years ago. It was very difficult for the first 6-8 months. He kept trying to get into my house, trying to live with me again, harassing me and all these things. To be honest, I did think many, many times about going back with him in order to give my children “a normal family”, but it is impossible to live with a person that is violent and tries to verbally abuse or physical abuse you.

LEANNE’S STORY

We’ve had lots of trouble with housing. We were renting somewhere else but having trouble because he kept turning up at the house, sending threatening messages, but never enough so the Police could do anything. We liked it there but had to move because we just didn’t feel safe.

He kept turning up and doing burnouts on the front lawn and saying that he’s going to hang himself from the front tree and we just didn’t like it, we didn’t feel safe. I feel safer where I am now, but there’s always a bit of you that is wary. I do look out the window quite often if there’s a car that’s pulled up, particularly at night time if someone’s pulled up over the road, I do have a look and worry. I look to see if they’ve gone a short time after. I think it’s the circumstance with my ex out on bail. He’s able to work, he’s not on house arrest anymore, so he does what he pleases really until the court date.

WE CAN ALL MAKE A DIFFERENCE

Recognise behaviour that’s causing harm to you or an older person you know.

Listen to their story, let them know you understand what they are saying and how they are feeling.

Level of urgency. Is it an emergency? What are the threats? Is there a possibility of them hurting themselves or others?

Plan. If at risk, tell them you are concerned and call the Police. If it is not immediately serious, talk to them about a safety plan and where they could go for help.

Refer. Let them know you are there for them and help them find services.

Document. Keep a note of what you have done.